Colonel Parker met comedian Jackie Kahane while he was opening for Wayne Newton in Las Vegas. The Colonel appreciated Jackie’s clever, yet clean, family-friendly, routine and promptly hired him as an opener for Elvis during his 1970s performances. Jackie often toured with Elvis and the crew and offered is a hilarious diary, written by Jackie during the March 1974 tour. It was intended for the TCB group and musicians, as indicated on the cover, a statement followed by the warning “Any reproduction, reprint, or distribution of same to outsiders is punishable by castration or a two week exile to Monroe.” The last most likely referring to the stops in Monroe, Louisiana and Monroe, Alabama, during the February 28 through March 20 tour. The diary begins with a letter to Elvis dated March 20, 1974, which Jackie begins, “Perhaps I should address you as Most Exalted Ruler, Master of all you survey, King of the Box Office....but if I slip into comfortable familiarity at this time, it is for one reason, and only for one reason....my check is now securely hidden in the secret compartment of my Jockey shorts.” The diary continues with more jocularity, “Unbeknownst to the group, I have taken it upon myself to record each day’s activities, in a ‘Daily Log’ for purposes of information, memorabilia, and blackmail.” He continues in this entertaining tone to describe events in detail, such as in the entry for March 1 in Tulsa, Oklahoma: “Our tour began today...am looking forward to 20 days of revelry, debauchery and constipation. ... Our embarkation was made more pleasant by our two lovely hostesses Cheryl and Bambi. ... The stewardesses ingratiated themselves to the entire group by serving us breakfast, which became daily fare...Stale doughnuts that were Red Cross rejects, and coffee. This coffee tasted as though it had been strained through Mrs. Olsen’s panty hose.” Jackie continues with one quip after another, some more off-color than others. A truly hysterical read.